If you believe humanity is good
If you believe we creatures are truly intelligent
If you believe in the science of equilibrium, dharma, karma
You’d care less about the rules and more about your conscience.
2010 rolled into the station, predictably on time but blowing a whistle and puffing a little more steam than I recalled anticipating. Amidst the fog, I stumbled into a content, wryly amused and empowered cabin; where ‘wrong decisions’ that ‘feel right’ become acceptable, and ‘right decisions’ that ‘feel wrong’, condemnable.
I committed mental treason,
a coup on Western society,
I have stolen back the element of choice.
We fool ourselves with sweeping claims that humanity is in tune with one another. Taking the life of another human being is wrong, equality is right; a Benetton advert of creeds and colours holding hands and embracing a helix of seemingly universal edicts isn’t human experience condensed. That isn’t what we know hour by hour, each day, each year.
We wonder whether to buy the Big Issue, whether to eat that doughnut, whether to kiss them again now we noticed the glint of a wedding ring. Do we stand up for the institution, indemnify ourselves as it wasn’t our finger bearing the band or pretend, even to ourselves, we hadn’t noticed?
In my 2010, the criteria for good and bad are measured against a level of genuine, intrinsic guilt that arises resulting from an action, not societal shame.
And there is a difference.
Such a difference.
The rules protect the system.
My conscience protects my humanity.
I know to whom I bow.